The concept of a “sleep divorce” — couples sleeping in separate rooms to improve their rest — has seen a surge in popularity, with Google searches on the topic increasing by 41% in the past year. For couples dealing with sleep disruptions caused by snoring, fidgeting, or conflicting schedules, this arrangement can be a great solution. To help couples navigate this balance, interior designer Rhiannon Masters, Head of Brand at Piglet in Bed, and relationship coach Gemma Nice offer expert advice on creating separate but connected sleep spaces.

Find Your Calming Colors

According to Masters, color is essential in designing individual sleep spaces that foster relaxation. “A bedroom should be set up for optimal sleep, and this means being a space that feels calm and serene — how this looks will vary from person to person,” she explains. “Color is one of the most important factors; some colors will evoke a sense of calm, whilst others can be more stimulating, which will impact your ability to wind down and get restful sleep.” Masters suggests natural hues such as blues, greens, oatmeals, and dusty shades of pink to make the space feel soothing.

Consider the Senses

Comfort goes beyond visual appeal; it’s about engaging all the senses. “Senses are important when it comes to bedtime and can make or break a good night’s sleep,” says Masters. “In your rooms, you should consider your senses individually. What sounds would you like to hear?” For example, white noise or a rainfall machine may soothe one partner, while the other prefers silence. Masters also suggests using candles, diffusers, or pillow sprays with calming scents like lavender or chamomile. When separated, try an L-shaped pillow to recreate the sensation of cuddling, which “helps you to feel calm and relieve stress levels.”

Talk Out Any Issues Before Bedtime

Relationship coach Gemma Nice recommends addressing any unresolved conflicts before heading to bed. “Going to sleep on an argument or unresolved conflicts will leave you both in the stress response where your cortisol levels are high,” she says. “This will then impact your ability to get the all-important deep REM sleep.” Sitting in a shared, calming space to talk through the day’s events allows both partners to go to bed with clear minds and a positive outlook.

Make Time for Evening Connection

Nice suggests incorporating a shared evening routine to maintain closeness despite separate sleep spaces. “Having a bath or shower together allows you both to fall into the parasympathetic nervous system, a calmer state that is important for quality sleep,” she explains. Simple acts like a massage or listening to music together can also help both partners feel connected, regardless of whether it ends in physical intimacy.